Writing Again

I have not written for this blog in over a year. The last time I posted I wrote about doing what you love and how this really sets one up for frustration because few, if any, of us have the luxury of only engaging in work that makes us feel emotionally fulfilled and happy. There are awful parts of nearly every activity—even to make an omelette you must crack some eggs. Sometimes we just need to do the activities rather than think about all of the negative things associated with them.

While I tend to be introspective, sullen, contemplative, and wallowing in the existential—I find that when I simply focus on the behavioral, rather than all of the emotions and thoughts and internal conflicts that go with getting work done, that I am much more productive, and after the fact, happy. Another way of putting it is to “fake it ‘til you make it.” Do what you have to do, force a smile while doing it, and once the task is accomplished, no matter how distasteful, you can walk away feeling satisfied. There is actually quite a bit of research to back up this approach and many psychologists, social workers, and therapists implement it with their clients.  Being a psychologist and a social worker (who has actually worked briefly as a therapist, been in therapy and who is married to a therapist), one would think I would know better.

Instead, I have spent the last year and a half wondering why I can’t write more, something I enjoy accomplishing, but often don’t enjoy getting started on. There is no shortage of topics that I have an opinion or insights about, but frequently I get wrapped up in the depressing nature of the news that I am bombarded with, I become afraid to share a contrarian view, I get discouraged when someone writes something online that is similar, and in my view better written than what I could accomplish, and so I do not write at all.

Much of the literature on writing and how to write generally boils down to one thing: If one wants to be a writer, then one should write. Make the time to write and do it—behavioral; the great ideas and flowery language will follow. The accomplishment and good feelings will happen after the fact.

One area of my life that I have very effectively taken this behavioral approach is in running. As the Taoist saying goes, “the journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.” If you want to run, then run, one step at a time, and the accomplishment of travelling a certain distance, however far, will eventually follow. There was an article recently published in The Atlantic that argued that running and writing go hand in hand. This past year I have run two marathons and a half marathon. In training this year I have run 733.6 miles. I know this because I have kept track of my running with an app that logs my miles and then posts them to social media.

Therein lies the second aspect of a behavioral approach, the reinforcement of behavior. The first step is to engage in the behavior and then the second step is to reap the reward. For me, simple and narcissistic person that I can be, it is simply having people “like” my run on Facebook, or being able to publicly share that I ran. And with that I am motivated to run more.

I run even though many of the miles are actually painful in some way--gasping for breath, pain in my joints, a stitch in my side. Even being a somewhat seasoned runner, getting started is still hard, and keeping the behavior going, one foot in front of the other, mile by mile, requires a level of concentration and that takes work. But it happens; while never easy, it gets easier.

And so now, less than an hour ago, I typed a word on the screen, and then another and another. And right here there are 662. I plan to write more and I know my writing partner René does as well. And we hope you’ll read—and like or even dislike some of what we produce. Just let us know that you’re out there and we’ll keep it up. That’s all we can do.

I feel better already.